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The Comparison Trap & How To Avoid It

August 19th, 2014

Health & Lifestyle

The Comparison Trap & How To Avoid It

August 19, 2014

“Comparison is the thief of joy”

This quote could not be more true if it tried. Why do we do it? Why do we fall into the trap of comparing ourselves to others.

It is one of THE most destructive behaviours that you can do. Trust me I know. I used to live it every day and really struggled with this in the past. I used to compare myself to everyone and everything. Resulting in me suffering with low self esteem and a lack of self worth. This was the catalyst that spurred on my terrible relationship with food. Never feeling good enough so seeking comfort from things outside of myself.
But what I learn’t from years of falling into the comparison trap was that it was only keeping me small and wasn’t allowing me to express who I really was and it was holding me back from going after what I wanted. I have come a long way in not letting my mean girl control me but I am only human. I do still fall victim to comparing myself to others from time to time but I have identified my triggers and I am able to snap out of it much quicker and it no longer has control of the way I view myself or the way I live.

I want you to stop with the comparing so you can finally get unstuck and move forward with confidence and have belief in yourself. I want you to realise how amazing you are and that the only thing that is holding you back is yourself. It is time to make a change.

Shift from comparison to self acceptance with my top these 3 tools that have helped me in my journey:

Detox your social media accounts

I used to follow all the wrong people on social media which only made the act of comparing worse. So stop following the Victoria Secret models or the celebrities that you think have it all or anyone else that you know are making you feel worse and that keep making dents in your confidence. Follow people who are inspiring. The people who make you feel empowered and leave you feeling comfortable with who you are.

Reconnect with yourself

I used to replay the same old story in my head that I wasn’t good enough, pretty enough or smart enough. Quieten your inner critic by taking time to reconnect with yourself. Silence your inner critic by attend a yoga class, meditate, go for a walk. Whatever it is that allows you to stop looking for things outside yourself for validation but turn inward.

Make a Love list

We are an accumulation of our thoughts and feelings so it is time to change the negativity tape that replays in your head to a positive one. Write a list of all the things that make you YOU. Your little quirks, imperfections. The things that you love about yourself. When you shift your mindset from unworthiness to owning everything that you are right now, in this moment, you will feel lighter and free to be your true authentic self. You are perfect just the way you are.

Now tell me. How do you avoid the comparison trap?

All my love,

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4 Comments

  • Reply Caroline Mentzer September 26, 2014 at 3:02 pm

    Hi Lydia, I like your tip about un-following the people that don’t make you feel your best and think that it should be extended to friends and acquaintances too. I hate the facebook or fakebook culture that makes you feel like you’re not living the dream life everyone else is. After all it’s just a perception that people try and create. I always like those, like yourself, who keep it real. Thanks, Caroline x

    • Reply lydiamccall September 26, 2014 at 6:38 pm

      Thanks so much for your comment Caroline. It is an important topic that I think needs to be addressed more often xx

  • Reply Natasha September 28, 2014 at 10:52 pm

    So true! In terrible for FOMO (fear of missing out) and I’m always wondering why I don’t get the same opportunities as others etc. it’s a terrible thing to do! I like the idea of a love list. Definitely going to do that. x
    Tash | http://danceflowlift.com

    • Reply lydiamccall September 30, 2014 at 10:21 am

      Thanks so much for sharing. FOMO is so common now a days what with social media. The love list is a great tool to help you with this xx

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